Partner Events

Denim Day USA 2013 and the Need for NO MORE Excuses

“I didn’t know it was a rape. I don’t know what rape looks like.”

This is the comment from a 16-year-old high school boy who witnessed the sexual assault of a female student in Steubenville, Ohio when asked why he didn’t do something to stop it. This comment has not left my mind. It’s very discouraging. After all the “progress” that has been made in working to change the social norms that support violence and the attitudes that allow rape and other sexual violence to persist, clearly we are not there yet! What is wrong with this picture that in a suburban high school in Ohio, not only was a young girl repeatedly raped and assaulted, then videotaped but many students participated and/or witnessed the assault, did nothing, laughed and sent the images virally around the world.

Boys being boys? Bystanders in denial? Witnesses caught like deer in the headlights? Unconscious accomplices? Immaturity combined with entitlement? Of course it reminds me of the Jerry Sandusky case at Penn State where the assistant coach saw “something” in the locker room between Sandusky and a youth and although disturbed by what he saw, he wasn’t sure and he didn’t know what to do and so did nothing to intervene.

So here we are in April, which is Sexual Assault Awareness Month and also Child Abuse Prevention Month. Yesterday, Wednesday, April 24th was the 14th annual Denim Day USA, is a sexual violence prevention education campaign dedicated to supporting survivors of all ages, genders, races, ethnicities and nationalities, and preventing rape. Each year we promote wearing jeans with a purpose and invite youth to participate in educational opportunities to debunk the myths that continue to persist. Clearly, there is so much more education to do. We need more bystander education that aims to engage everyone to become aware and alert and to care about this issue for their own well-being and for the well-being of others. There is something to say for “doing the right thing” kind of education. Are there enough courses in schools teaching how important it is to do the right thing and if you are not sure — to find out?

Organizations like Peace Over Violence and 1in6 work on the issue of sexual abuse everyday, not just on Denim Day. Every month is sexual abuse awareness and prevention month for the network of an agencies that provides intervention services, prevention and policy toward the vision of a culture that doesn’t ignore, allow, excuse or condone sexual violence in any form.

Our efforts must persist but we also have to rethink, reframe and perhaps reinvent how we do what we do to have greater impact. We have to find more ways to engage individuals—especially young people, communities, families and all of our institutions in this effort. We have a long way to go. I personally refuse to give up or to abandon this vision. It’s time to organize and engage with one another so that our very culture says NO MORE to sexual violence, domestic abuse and child abuse.

I believe we can get there. Will you believe too?

- By Patti Giggans

Patti Giggans is the Executive Director of Peace Over Violence. Peace Over Violence is dedicated to building healthy relationships, families and communities free from sexual, domestic and interpersonal violence. She is also the Vice-President of the Board of Directors for 1in6.

The mission of 1in6 is to help men who have had unwanted or abusive sexual experiences in childhood live healthier, happier lives.

1in6′s mission also includes serving family members, friends and partners by providing information and support resources on the web and in the community.

Joyful Heart and 1in6 invite you to visit 1in6.org for info, options and hope, and to learn more about our partnership and Engaging Men initiative at men.joyfulheartfoundation.org.

The views expressed above are not necessarily those of the Joyful Heart Foundation or 1in6.

Join Us Tomorrow for the Second #YourVoiceCounts Twitter Chat

Approximately 1 in 4 women and nearly 1 in 7 men in the United States have experienced severe physical violence by an intimate partner at some point in their lifetimes. On average, 3 women die each day in domestic violence-related deaths in our country. Over 15 million children witness domestic violence each year.

Yet domestic violence remains a largely hidden epidemic. Because we all have a role to play in preventing violence—and because talking about it is one of the first steps to ending it—the Verizon Foundation and CBS Sportscaster James Brown are helping to get the conversation going during a special #YourVoiceCounts Twitter Chat before the Super Bowl on Thursday, January 31 from 4:00 – 5:00 pm ET.

The Verizon Foundation’s Your Voice Counts campaign is all about equipping bystanders—especially men—with tools to start talking about domestic violence and raising awareness in their communities.

During this special one-hour event the Verizon Foundation (@VerizonGiving), James Brown (@JBSportscaster) Joyful Heart (@TheJHF) and Mariska will talk to fans about what they can do to help end domestic violence and promote healthy role modeling and masculinity. In light of recent tragedies in the NFL community, such as the one out of Kansas City, people are talking about domestic violence, and it’s that conversion we hope to elevate and continue.

We’ll also be joined by Your Voice Counts partners and leading advocates from A CALL TO MEN (@LiveRespect) and NO MORE (@NOMOREorg), who will share insight and resources on this critical topic. The chat will give participants an opportunity to talk with NFL insiders, celebrities and advocates about domestic violence and sports, the role men, fathers and coaches and mentors play in prevention and more.

Joining is simple!

Just log on to Twitter (www.twitter.com) on January 31 at 4:00 pm ET. Search for the hashtag #YourVoiceCounts to follow the conversation and add the hashtag to your own tweets to join in.

Don’t miss out on the chance to get involved!

@VerizonGiving and our partners will be re-tweeting your answers and comments. For more information on speaking up against domestic violence, please visit the Verizon Foundation website www.verizonfoundation.org/yourvoicecounts).

This Twitter chat is designed as an open forum for participants to come together, ask questions and share information about how to speak up against domestic violence. For your own safety, we ask that you not disclose any personal or identifying information during our Twitter chat. To read more about protecting your personal information and safety on Twitter, we invite you to visit: support.twitter.com/articles/18368-safety-private-information#.

If you’re in immediate danger or you believe someone else is, please call 911. If you suspect domestic violence (or any other crime) is happening, don’t think of it as a “private matter” or simply “none of your business.” Use your voice to connect someone to life-saving resources like the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233). Verizon Wireless customers can simply dial #HOPE to be connected to the Hotline

1in6 Thursday: Upstander – Youth Lead the Way

Peace Over Violence is in the midst of holding our third annual Summer Youth Leadership Institute on Violence Prevention. Twenty-five youth are participating in a month-long training learning about the dynamics of relationship and sexual violence and about healthy relationships. These youth are prioritizing violence prevention and learning skills and tools to take with them as they become leaders in their own lives and in their communities.

These middle and high school youth, male and female are devoting their summer free time to collaborating on learning about healthy relationships and violence prevention strategies and connecting the dots to social change and social justice.

A segment of the Youth Leadership Institute this year includes three internship tracks: creating a violence prevention application for smartphones; writing, performing and recording songs about healthy relationships; and developing community and online organizing campaigns focused around healthy relationships.

Last week, these engaged and engaging young people participated in the Start Strong Virtual Conference, a national initiative supported by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and The Blue Shield of California Foundation. Eleven Start Strong sites from around the country connected virtually around the theme of what it means to be an “upstander” as opposed to a “bystander.”

Upstander is the opposite of bystander. A bystander is someone that does not speak up or act when they witness acts of intolerance, disrespect, bullying or violence taking place. They just go about their business. The attitude is, “it’s none of my business.” An upstander is someone who takes action when faced with these acts. It’s not just about an individual standing up, it’s about institutions also. The Penn State child sexual abuse tragedy is an example of an institution led by people that stood by and did nothing to protect children. One of the young men in the youth institute said, “Everybody should learn about how harmful sexual and domestic violence can be.” Another young man talked about how he had heard the phrase “be the change” a few times and really didn’t understand it until he joined the Leadership Institute.  This young football player now says “I really get it now and now I am the change. Change starts and continues with me.”

Unfortunately, we live in a world with way too many bystanders and not enough UPSTANDERS! But while observing these youth leaders in action here in Los Angeles and across the country, I have a strong and hopeful feeling that this is about to change and youth will be leading the way!

–By Patti Giggans

Patti Giggans is the Executive Director of Peace Over Violence. Peace Over Violence is dedicated to building healthy relationships, families and communities free from sexual, domestic and interpersonal violence. She is also the Vice-President of the Board of Directors for 1in6.

The mission of 1in6 is to help men who have had unwanted or abusive sexual experiences in childhood live healthier, happier lives.

1in6′s mission also includes serving family members, friends and partners by providing information and support resources on the web and in the community.

Joyful Heart and 1in6 invite you to visit 1in6.org for info, options and hope, and to learn more about our partnership and Engaging Men initiative at men.joyfulheartfoundation.org.

The views expressed above are not necessarily those of the Joyful Heart Foundation or 1in6.

 

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There Is No Excuse—On Denim Day or Any Day

As you know, April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. And this year, Joyful Heart partnered with dozens of organizations, community-based programs and government officials to turn towards the issue of sexual assault in New York City with Denim Day.

Denim Day is an award-winning annual sexual violence prevention and education campaign started by our Los Angeles-based partner, Peace Over Violence. It grew out of a 1990s Italian Supreme Court case in which the Court’s decision overturned a rape conviction because the victim wore tight jeans. The judges reasoned the victim’s tight jeans meant that she had to have helped her assailant remove them, implying consent. People all over the world were outraged, and wearing jeans became an international symbol of protest against erroneous and destructive attitudes and myths surrounding sexual assault. Last year, more than 2.6 million people participated in Denim Day throughout the U.S.

This year is New York’s third year participating in Denim Day campaign and Joyful Heart is so proud to have joined the coalition. In addition to activities, workshops and programs happening throughout all five boroughs for youth and adults on Denim Day, we held a press conference on the steps of City Hall yesterday to kick off our coalition’s Denim Day events.

Manhattan Borough President Scott M. Stringer kicks off the Denim Day NYC 2012 Press Conference.

In addition to our Denim Day organizers the New York City Alliance Against Sexual Assault, Manhattan Borough President Scott M. Stringer, the St. Luke’s Roosevelt Crime Victims Treatment Center and Start Strong Bronx, we were joined by advocates, youth government officials and individuals who filled the steps of City Hall to bring the message to New york that there is no excuse and never an invitation to rape.

We’re sharing that message nationally too. Yesterday, Mariska penned an op-ed in the Huffington Post with Denim Day founder Patti Giggans. From their article:

The way our society thinks about rape and receives survivors is not only tragic, it’s dangerous. Fearing that they won’t be believed, survivors are less likely to report their rapes, which means rapists stay out of jail, which means they are free to rape again.

Denim Day is about coming together as a community that has no tolerance for sexual violence, a community that commits its resources—intellectual, financial, emotional—to responding differently to survivors and making their healing a priority.

To read the entire article, click here.

We and our partners are also sharing this message in social media (that would be #denimday, if you’re on Twitter) in hospitals and rape crisis programs, offices, schools and colleges throughout the country. Together, we can change these harmful victim-blaming attitudes about sexual violence. We can change the way we think about, respond to and support survivors of sexual assault.

If you are wearing denim today, please be sure you have registered your support on www.denimdayusa.org. We invite you to submit photos of yourself in your denim to blog@joyfulheartfoundation.org and share what you’re doing for Denim Day in the comments below.

It's TIme To Talk Day

On December 8th, It’s Time To Talk

On December 8, 2011, more than 80 people will come together to talk about domestic violence and sexual assault at Liz Claiborne Inc.’s eighth annual It’s Time to Talk Day. On that day, thanks to a long-standing partnership with Talk Radio News Service, radio hosts from around the country will travel to Times Square in New York City and use their broadcast platforms to help generate awareness and educate the public about these issues.

What makes this event significant is not the number of years it has run—though this is something we are quite proud of. Rather what distinguishes this day is the breadth of people we reach with messages of prevention, of hope and of healing.

With radio as the medium, we can touch a huge range of individuals and remind them that they are not alone; that there are people out there who care if they are not safe at home…who care if they have been sexually assaulted…who care to teach them and their children what digital dating abuse looks like and how to address it. With the help of these amazing radio hosts—some of whom come back year after year to help share these messages—we can reinforce why it is so important to speak out about these issues, rather than hide them away in dark corners.

The other aspect of It’s Time to Talk Day that makes it unique is the camaraderie that is fostered among the guests who come to be interviewed. Celebrities, business people, advocates, survivors, government officials and law enforcement mingle and meet. Though we do not know the exact numbers, over the years many a partnership has been formed as people snack on chips or sip coffee waiting for their time on the air.

So what can someone do to help on December 8th? Help us bring the domestic violence and sexual assault into the light. Use that day as a catalyst to start conversations about these issues with your friends, family and co-workers. Post a message on Facebook or send a tweet. Certainly there is enough in the news these days to discuss. You don’t have to have all the answers—just opening up a dialogue is valuable. Then you can check out www.joyfulheartfoundation.org or www.loveisnotabuse.com to learn more.

Though it may not seem like it to you, this one little step can go a long way to teaching everyone across the country that one day is not enough…that it’s always time to talk about these issues—at least until there is nothing left to talk about.

Jane Randel is the Director of Liz Claiborne Inc.’s Love Is Not Abuse initiatives, which strive to address partner abuse at its root cause. The company has begun a sustained effort to focus on teen dating abuse and violence. With a teen dating abuse prevention curriculum, hand books and innovative research to help teens, teachers, parents and domestic violence organizations, Liz Claiborne Inc. provides free resources to all members of society—alerting all demographics to the domestic violence epidemic and educating them on what they can do, individually and collectively to curtail abuse. Join in the conversation by visiting www.loveisnotabuse.com.