Dear Joyful Heart Community,

I am writing tonight with a heavy heart. Earlier today, we were confronted with the horrific news from Newtown, Connecticut.

We want express our deepest condolences to the children, families, teachers, friends and loved ones in Newtown and across the state. Our hearts are open and wounded with yours.

As we all worked to individually process this tragedy and as more information was shared throughout the day, we have been thinking about if and what kind of an organizational response might be most appropriate.

While our first thoughts went to the victims of today’s shooting and their loved ones, and our own families and loved ones, we have also explored the toll such difficult news might have on our larger community—many of whom are survivors of violence and trauma. Our Vice President of Clinical Programs, Sherisa Dahlgren, has prepared a short set of self-care recommendations that we thought might prove helpful to you or others that you know, so we are sharing it below.

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Self-Care In the Wake of a Shared Tragedy

How do we even begin to take in the full depth of this morning’s events? While our instincts may be to respectfully listen to each detail as we mourn alongside those suffering, please remember that each time we bear witness to suffering there is an emotional toll. A price paid collectively and individually in response to a national tragedy.

We think of those suffering—of what they must be going through—and try to imagine for a moment that we are in their shoes. Be gentle with yourself. It is important to acknowledge what has occurred and to allow and experience the full range of our feelings long enough for them to successfully pass through us. It is also important to pace yourself, shed your tears and care for yourself through this process.

Below is an offering of self-care tips that you may find helpful:

Limit Exposure.

Respectfully acknowledge the tragedy, then allow yourself respite from the information. The events we see may bring up ties to our own losses and worries for our future. Allow time away from focusing on the event to pace yourself with this process.

Nurture Yourself.

Stress can be a result of the intake of high levels of information. This information needs time to energetically leave our bodies, in the form of relaxation or exercise. Take a long bath. Walk in nature. Listen to soothing music. Go for a jog. Connect with your spiritual practice. Make the time to do what you know makes you feel better.

Care for Your Body.

There is a physical toll on your body that comes from processing excessive amounts of emotional information. To help balance this, take extra care of yourself in the aftermath of receiving stressful information. Breathe deeply for 3 minutes. Eat foods filled with nutrients. Drink water and avoid foods that are stressful on your immune system like processed sugars. Listen to what your body truly needs and respond with compassion.

Find a Creative Outlet.

We may find ourselves wanting to just “do something” in response to a trauma. Sometimes, this is our intuition looking for a healthy outlet for emotions to surface and exit our bodies. Draw, paint, color or make a collage. Dance or move your body. Sing, chant or raise your voice together with your friends. Your body knows what it needs to let the feelings out.

Tips for Talking With Children:

• Limit exposure to the news and media outlets.
• Share information that is developmentally appropriate and speak honestly in clear, easy to understand language.
• Be calm and keep routines familiar.
• Reassure children that they are safe, and that these situations are rare.
• Listen carefully without making assumptions about a child’s feelings, thoughts and experiences.
• Securely reaffirm your own relationship with the child.

Though we are overcome with sadness, we are heartened by the outpouring of support for those affected and we renew our commitment to working to build a community where all are safe from violence and abuse.

With gratitude,