Heal the Healers Profile: Oscar Smith

Another thing that bothers me is that people know the difference between right and wrong, and some just choose that wrong option all the time. No matter what. They know they're going to cause someone harm or pain in their life, and they just don't care.

PH: How do you deal with that frustration?

OS: You just sort of grin and bear it. There's not much you can do. You can't change the system. That's unfortunately why a lot of people get burned out. There are the firemen dealing with arsonists. Or doctors dealing with alcohol or drug patients. Or psychiatrists dealing with people who want to kill themselves and eventually do. It's about not taking all that guilt on yourself. It's about saying, "Hey, I tried. I gave my best to guide this person in the right direction." Unfortunately, you can't control their outcome.

PH: Why aren't you burned out?

OS: I just like to keep an open mind. You keep things open. You can't let everything consume you. I know I can't change the whole world, but if I can change one thing-it's the same thing when I was a teacher, if I can teach that one kid, that one nerdy, geeky kid who feels like he doesn't belong in a class full of jocks, if I get him to just try to shoot a basket, or try and kick the ball, that means a lot.

PH: What do you do to take care of your mental health, your physical health, your spiritual health?

OS: The mental health part is actually just talking. Talking to my clients that I train at my gym, to my wife, other guys in law enforcement. That's one thing about cops, they'll go into a bar and sit and drink and just relate stories, and next thing you know, it's four or five hours later. Unfortunately, that's one thing that they do constantly, instead of going home and sharing it with their wives or with someone close.

PH: Can you go up to another cop that you know well and say, "I'm having a hard time. I'm dying here"?

OS: That's a sign of weakness. Cops all have that honor thing. Like a bunch of Spartans running around. They have organizations where you can talk, like group therapy, one-on-one therapy. But then guys aren't going to see you as the pillar you're supposed to be. "The one who's going to cry is also going to die." It's more accepted in the police department to be violent, have a serious drug problem or be an alcoholic. All of that is considered a way of blowing off steam.

PH: Does anyone use those organizations that offer individual or group therapy?

OS: Not really. They have to make their records public to the police department. If the department thinks you have a problem, they'll take your gun away because they're afraid you'll snap or kill yourself.

PH: Have you ever gone?

OS: No.

PH: How do you think things should be? What's your ideal scenario to avoid burnout in the police department?

OS: The ideal thing would be a group where you can talk inside each precinct. It would be with the people you work with, and you'd get together to talk and share things. And ideally, your commanding officers would be twenty-year veterans. So they've seen it all, and they can say to you, "I know exactly what you're going through. You did your best. The guy jumped off the building. You tried to talk him down. It didn't work." Or "I'm sorry that little woman got knocked down and got her purse stolen and broke her hip." You were seconds away. You can't be everywhere."