Today, we have a guest post from country singer Buffy Lawson. Buffy arrived in Nashville, the Music City, by way of Lexington, Kentucky, where she grew up singing from an early age. Somewhere along the way, she met “Steve.”

Today, on the eve of NO MORE Day, she shares her story about awakening, surviving, healing and sharing her journey through her art.          

I do not claim to be formally educated on the issue of abuse, but as a songwriter, one of my primary jobs is to pay attention to life. It has always been exceedingly important to me to inspire people through my music humorously, as well as addressing important issues.

That being said, sadly, I have had many friends and fans share stories of horrific instances of abuse. While never being physically struck myself, I have been in situations of emotional abuse and know firsthand how complicated the issue can be. Some of the strongest women I have ever met have found themselves broken down so far by their abusers that they were not able to control things from happening that they could have never imagined prior to that relationship. I was one of them.

“Steve” comes to mind. He was very kind and wonderful in the beginning. Our relationship seemed blissful but, over time, he began to become very critical of me. He did not like me to wear white t-shirts as he felt that they showed too much of my breasts. He discouraged me from wearing makeup or curling my hair. His explanation was that I looked “cheap” and not “intellectual.” Steve laughed at me if I couldn’t figure out the exact amount of a 20% tip in my head and was condescending if I couldn’t remember the lead actor name in a film we had recently seen.

But it was so gradual that I didn’t see it happening. Until my sisters came to dinner with us one evening. He belittled me in front of them and they were outraged. 

I defended him, of course.

Steve cheated on me with a woman that he brought to our home, claiming they were friends. By the time I was aware of his affair, my confidence was gone. I actually recall begging him to leave her.

Much time and many tears later, I realized that Steve was threatened by me. He did everything possible to dim my beautiful light and tried his best to prevent me from shining. I later realized that Steve was trying to compensate for his own well of insecurities by breaking me down, which is often the case.

I have known many others, both male and female, who were physically assaulted by their partners, as well as a precious friend who was murdered by her husband.

It became critically important for me to write a song that would address this horrible epidemic and offer promise and hope to people that so deserve it. “I’m Leaving You For Me” is a story about a very specific moment of clarity in a person’s life when they say: NO MORE. This will not continue to be my life. It’s about the instant when fuzziness, confusion and the feeling of brokenness are replaced with confidence, strength and respect.

It is my hope that “I’m Leaving You For Me” will give wings to those who have been emotionally and or physically caged. It is my prayer that every man and woman in the world will feel the freedom to fly and shine.

Check out “I’m Leaving You For Me” here. For more info on Buffy Lawson, please visit www.wrinkledrecords.com or www.buffylawson.com.