Reunion Online

Both women and men can be triggered by current events to re-experience the well-known “fight, flight, or freeze” responses left over from childhood trauma. Years of trauma research has shown us that establishing safety and emotional connection are important components in healing from childhood abuse.

So I was particularly pleased last week to travel to State College, Pennsylvania to mingle with local supporters of the recently formed Peaceful Hearts Foundation, an organization founded by Matthew and Kim Sandusky to support those who experienced childhood sexual abuse.

We begin this New Year with a much greater awareness within our communities than just a year ago about the frequency at which boys are subjected to unwanted or abusive sexual experiences. So let’s hope that when we look back on 2013, we’ll be able to see it as the tipping point year, when individual’s, families’ and communities’ support for men’s willingness to seek help to recover from unwanted or abusive childhood sexual experiences became the norm, rather than the exception.

For several days, one sentence has continued to trouble me: "I'll never forgive you." Those words were spoken by the man identified only as Victim 4 at the Jerry Sandusky sentencing on October 9, 2012. His words say several things to me.

The Sandusky sexual abuse trial is about to begin and the saga will unfold on the Internet, mainstream news and in the tabloids. Many stories will be told, exposed and exploited even with the restrictions on photography, texting, video and more imposed by the court. The witnesses will be put to credibility and reliability tests, memories will be challenged and the accused will sit in the courtroom confronted by his victim/accusers.