Reunion Online

With the start of the school year, I’m reminded of my surprise when my time in graduate school stirred so many unconscious reactions to my childhood sexual abuse. Recognizing what was happening eventually allowed me to manage those feelings. And it actually reinforced some valuable lessons about healing.

We’ve thought a lot about language at 1in6. I used to be a newspaper reporter. So I’m always conscious that what words I choose, how I speak, how the words are interpreted or understood can all determine, how the reader or listener takes in the meaning of the information.

It seems that a paradigm is shifting. The time when sexual and domestic violence issues were seen as women’s issues is beginning to wane. More and more adult men—and less surprisingly—more and more young men, including young males of high school age, are beginning to take on these issues as their own

Change is in the wind. This month has seen incredibly diverse news on sexual assault. As we grapple with the cultural change necessary to eliminate, or at least curb the rampant gender violence, progress is being made in some areas, side by side with continued ambivalence to the issue.

In this blog entry Cecil Murphey, the adult, acknowledges the child who experienced childhood sexual abuse. He describes a cathartic inner dialogue between the adult survivor and the wounded inner child.

Hope is essential to life, especially for those who are forced (or choose) to deal with painful experiences from our past. By biblical (and practical) definition, hope is only possibly when we have not yet obtained that which we are hoping for. “Hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance” (Romans 8:24-25). To endure painful circumstances we must develop a vision of a brighter future, one that is free of our current pain and hardship.

A little over a year ago, I wrote about an experience I had speaking with young male survivors of child sex abuse. It was called Help the Children Heal. Last week, I spoke with a group whom, one might assume, is the opposite end of the spectrum. I was invited to speak with young male offenders who were mostly minors.

“You did so much for me.” Monty ran up to me, embraced me and thanked me.

Last month, 1BlueString and 1in6 had an amazing experience raising awareness for male survivors of childhood sexual abuse at this summer’s Vans Warped Tour, an annual festival featuring alternative rock music and culture.

Randy Ellison discusses the moment he is able to “Open the Doors” to healthy possibilities and positive rewards. So many survivors have learned to protect themselves by keeping people and experiences at bay. Here, Randy shares the moment where finds the balance between a coping mechanism and letting in the great things life has to offer.